From Auntie Corinne

I spoke to a friend of mine who adopted a boy from a Romanian orphanage at age 3 about 7 years ago. I mentioned what happened with Uma and he assured me that she will be fine just a few months after her arrival. He says they get so distracted by all the attention and colorful toys, etc. that largely their trauma slips away. She might have night mares and some expected frustration and confusion at first, but he says his son adjusted fairly quickly to the new life (also not knowing any English). Ultimately, they feel their son will ALWAYS have a space in his heart that cannot be filled due to his unusual early life experiences (left in cribs for years then put into a big communal room with all aged kids with very little personal attention, etc..), but no more than any child who's been through a major transition in early life like a divorce, a death or a big move away to a new country or whatever. Uma will be won over by all the love and welcoming she will get here and you will probably see that she will be happy here very soon.Having two boys with such unique temperaments, I have learned that things that comfort Jaredan often upset Kanan and vice, versa. Uma might just be a child who gets scared initially around men or new people. But ultimately our nature is to welcome parental love. Nello came into my life after a very traumatic divorce (and my real father took care of me while my mom worked and then was suddenly gone) and won me over right away. However if you speak to my family members, they all remember me as a MAJOR cry baby, scared of everything and very clingy to my babysitters (always wanting to be held and carried around). At the age of 5, my mom said I was suddenly "cured" by becoming a professional child actress and I never cried again until I was 25! So who says what is healthy or not. Children cry for a multitude of reasons and we all need to be prepared for it and accept that any child forced into a new environment will react at first. Remember how Jaredan would cry when you came over when he was a baby 'cuz he knew that meant we were going out? But he now considers you his closest aunt from those experiences even if you recall it being tough to deal with when he cried like that. If a child is emotional and strong willed, they will cry for hours. My belief is that you are saving Uma from a very sad and hard life and bringing her into a very loving family that ANY child would be so lucky to have. Whatever her temperament is, you can only be there for her to soothe her pain and accept her unique style at processing stress, which is all any of us can do for each other.